Another day in Paradise!!!!!

Well....lets see..........My very first Blog...set up with the help of darling FreeThinker...god bless my Cotton polyester wool mix socks for being so simple!!!!

Now that I'm here, I'm not sure what to be saying at all!!!

Quick synopsis; November '08 ; I had just started to set up my beautiful life in Holland and get myself together (or so I hoped) when a wee trip back to the Emerald Isle (to gather provisions & what not) proved to be the downfall of my much anticipated and yearned for dream!
I realised Mother that wasn't doing so well and seemed to be a little off. Now, she has always been eccentric and rather nutty but this seemed different. To say she was away with the fairies would be pulling the tail a wee bit too much, but all the same, there were elements of tinkerbell fluttering around in her wee little head. Todays date? no idea.......What year is it? No idea.......When she mentioned her Father calling over (RIP 40+ yrs) for tea, I knew something was definitely awry!! Long and short of it? Alzheimers!!!!! So I went back to Holland, re-packed my things and came back to Ireland to see what needed to be done....and here I am.........5 months fecking later looking after the silly bitch, with no life never mind the idea of a bit of "play".

Don't get me wrong...I CHOOSE to do so...but it doesn't mean that I have to like it! I would rather do the right thing and make sure that she's ok than leave her to ruminate with Tinkerbell and the ToothFairy!! never mind so called "family & friends".....THAT I shall leave for another day! And I have to say it's rather amusing to be 3 or 4 different people in the space of a few hours........am I starting to feel slightly schizophrenic??? Hmmmmmm, very debatable, I hardly know what I am from one day to the next never mind Mothers intervention!! It is also extremely sad really, how someones' mind can deteriorate so much that they don't even recognise their own daughter. If it's short term memory that goes, why then and how can 35 years not exist????? I just don't understand it.

I came home this afternoon, after a much anticipated coffee meeting with a friend was cancelled and completely messed up my day, to be asked was the "other girl" coming back to cook later??? After stating 5 or 6 times that "I" was the other girl from earlier, she then proceeded to lay into me as to why I wasn't at home in my own house with "my" Mother??? What am I to do eh? I can't fecking win at all. It's like trying to placate a grumpy 5 year old that found the booze locker and wants to sleep it off.

Right....enough for today me thinks.....I need to get out of the house and see real people. Maybe...just maybe.....I could even pass a pleasant exchange with someone that won't chew my head off or start screaming at me?!!! OR........I could just open a bottle of deliciously chilled Sauvignon Blanc, get some brie and van Meulen and some bird shite mustard (that's the one with all the seeds in it) lock my door and pretend I'm back in Holland and all is well ..........